Neighborhood Watch

What’s this guy doing? Sitting on his SUV’s bumper out in front of his ground floor apartment. Hair uncombed, observing the street. Like this is the most normal thing in the world.

Can’t just be out in front of your home for no reason. Is he kidding? Have to be walking a dog, chatting on the phone, stretching before a dad run — what a sketchball.

Oh look now. He’s turned his attention to his slippers, smiling at them for no reason. What’s he thinking? Probably better not to know.

This neighborhood used to be so safe, too. There should be a law against just standing around. Can’t he go to the backyard for that sort of thing? No one needs to see this.

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